My grandmother loved her only son (2 daughters) until he hit puberty. When he became too much like a man and not so much like an adorable little cherub anymore she turned on him viciously. As a result, he started hanging out with older guys and gambling at a very early age. He was an addicted life-long gambler and died with $36 in his coat pocket, his entire "life savings." Luckily for him, he was handsome and charming and never had trouble finding a woman to "take care" of him. My mother divorced him when I was 6 and I didn't really see much of him after that. Ironically, his mother, my grandmother, was always very kind, loving, and supportive of me. Go figure.
C.J.! You're not going to believe this but I was just in the shower singing Neil Young's Heart of Gold and I got to thinking (as I always do whenever I hear that song) what does it mean to have a heart of gold? Aren't we all looking for that? Does anyone ever find it? And, what about the seekers--do THEY have a heart of gold to give in return? I've often heard stories of the prostitute with a heart of gold and always wondered what that meant, too. So you can imagine my absolute amazement as I sit here in my terry robe reading what you just wrote! You are a dear for saying that, but no, I'm afraid that isn't true--it couldn't possibly be--unless...what Neil Young meant was that WE'RE (each of us) the Heart of Gold and what we're so longingly seeking is right here, inside us, all along? ! If it weren't for your generous remark I might never have come to this realization! So--from one Gold Heart to Another: Thank You!
What you said about a child recoiling when a hand is reached toward them to brush a wisp of hair from their forehead--that is exactly what happened to my aunt, my father's sister, who had a very miserable and borderline abusive mother--well maybe a little more than borderline. When she got her first job after junior college working at a local factory, one day the foreman came walking toward her with his hand outstretched and she instinctively winced, raised her shoulders, and backed away--just momentarily, but he noticed. He have her a very sad look and said, "Norma, what's wrong? Did you think I was going to strike you? I would never do anything like that to you or anyone!" That was the first time, after a lifetime of being "broadsided" unawares by her angry mother, that she realized that it wasn't normal or appropriate or in any way acceptable to treat a child or anyone else that way. It was the first time she ever questioned the assumed infallibility of her mother, and it changed her life in many ways, especially as a future mother of two daughters. If only the right people, ripe for such a message, will read what you've written.
My heart goes out to people like your aunt, who never knew the gentle touch. It saddens me to see how it's perpetuated and spreads like a plague. Your father's sister? How did he fare growing up?
My grandmother loved her only son (2 daughters) until he hit puberty. When he became too much like a man and not so much like an adorable little cherub anymore she turned on him viciously. As a result, he started hanging out with older guys and gambling at a very early age. He was an addicted life-long gambler and died with $36 in his coat pocket, his entire "life savings." Luckily for him, he was handsome and charming and never had trouble finding a woman to "take care" of him. My mother divorced him when I was 6 and I didn't really see much of him after that. Ironically, his mother, my grandmother, was always very kind, loving, and supportive of me. Go figure.
I'm glad she was kind, loving and supportive of you. That's why you have a heart of gold.
Sounds like Grandma finally grew up and that's good..
C.J.! You're not going to believe this but I was just in the shower singing Neil Young's Heart of Gold and I got to thinking (as I always do whenever I hear that song) what does it mean to have a heart of gold? Aren't we all looking for that? Does anyone ever find it? And, what about the seekers--do THEY have a heart of gold to give in return? I've often heard stories of the prostitute with a heart of gold and always wondered what that meant, too. So you can imagine my absolute amazement as I sit here in my terry robe reading what you just wrote! You are a dear for saying that, but no, I'm afraid that isn't true--it couldn't possibly be--unless...what Neil Young meant was that WE'RE (each of us) the Heart of Gold and what we're so longingly seeking is right here, inside us, all along? ! If it weren't for your generous remark I might never have come to this realization! So--from one Gold Heart to Another: Thank You!
What you said about a child recoiling when a hand is reached toward them to brush a wisp of hair from their forehead--that is exactly what happened to my aunt, my father's sister, who had a very miserable and borderline abusive mother--well maybe a little more than borderline. When she got her first job after junior college working at a local factory, one day the foreman came walking toward her with his hand outstretched and she instinctively winced, raised her shoulders, and backed away--just momentarily, but he noticed. He have her a very sad look and said, "Norma, what's wrong? Did you think I was going to strike you? I would never do anything like that to you or anyone!" That was the first time, after a lifetime of being "broadsided" unawares by her angry mother, that she realized that it wasn't normal or appropriate or in any way acceptable to treat a child or anyone else that way. It was the first time she ever questioned the assumed infallibility of her mother, and it changed her life in many ways, especially as a future mother of two daughters. If only the right people, ripe for such a message, will read what you've written.
My heart goes out to people like your aunt, who never knew the gentle touch. It saddens me to see how it's perpetuated and spreads like a plague. Your father's sister? How did he fare growing up?
I just got the most delightful internet hug and for that I ‘ll hug you right back. Thank you, thank you, thank you.