My Take on Masculinity

Two Younger Brothers and my Cousin

My Take on Masculinity

To begin with, I should probably give you a ‘proper’ definition of the word masculinity from the dictionary:

“Masculinity: A set of attributes, behaviors, and roles associated with men and boys.”

Now, diving a little deeper below the old dictionary definition, I want to tell you about my initial take on masculinity —-what I saw as a teen with two younger brothers and a male cousin, my age, who lived with us while I was growing up.

My oldest younger brother, Tim, was on the wrestling team in high school. I don’t know how many times he was injured. I didn’t count and he didn’t talk about them —that is, until the next day when the bruises or swelling showed up and one of us asked him about it.

Tim didn’t seem to think complaining was the manly thing to do. It was like athletic bruises and swellings were a rite of passage into manhood. He wore them proudly like a badge of masculinity and something to be proud of.

My cousin, Bill, came to live with us in junior high school. He was my age and we loved and accepted him as another brother.

Bill played varsity football in high school and he looked at his injuries the same as Tim. There was one game where he actually broke his wrist in the first play after half time. He didn’t bring it to anyone’s attention until after they won the game.

Mom and Dad asked why he didn’t say something to the coach, or trainer. They would have made sure it got wrapped, iced, and put in a sling and he could have watched the rest of the gamed from the bench.

“Uncle Joe, Auntie Joanne, I am NOT a Sissie.”

Chip, my youngest brother was also on the high school wrestling team. He was just as concerned with his pride and masculinity as the other two I mentioned. During one match, I saw him take a header off the mat onto the wood floor in the gym. You could almost watch the goose egg hematoma grow on his forehead by the minute —but he never said a word.

Something else noteworthy enough to mention … any time we saw the three of them in the TV room at the same time watching TV without their shoes on, we walked on by the doorway. We knew to find something else to do for a while.

The air was so thick with testosterone mixed with smelly feet that … well, trust me. You didn’t want to be in there with them. If you’re anything like me, your gag reflex would get triggered.

What is the unspoken fascination boys and men have with proving their masculinity? It’s so obvious and something I’ve always wondered about. But, I have a little secret I’m going to share about those three manly macho guys.

This is what happened every time we went hiking or mushroom hunting out in the woods. When we got back home, it wasn’t long before I heard a blood curdling feminine scream from one of them:

“Aaaacckkk! HELP! I FOUND A TICK! GET IT OFF ME!”

Broken bones, bruises, swellings and goose egg hematomas aside … an itty-bitty little thing like a tick can bring even the most macho male down to their knees …

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