Can Only Men be Charming?

Not at all. Women can be charming, too.

Years ago, I worked in an office with an interesting and very nice 60 year-old lady. About a year after the death of her husband, she started dating again. In the years that followed, she had three serious marriage proposals which she politely turned down.

What puzzled me was, she wasn’t a beauty in the traditional sense. She had no waist, a very short neck, but every day, her hair and makeup were impeccable and she almost always wore a dress to work. Yet she was what you would call a ‘male-magnet’.

One day, the girls in the office and I decided to get to the bottom of this “male-magnet” thing with our friend. Why did this ‘older woman’ attract so much attention from men? So, we took her to lunch and just asked her ...

"Gee, I don’t really know. I’ve been told I’m a good conversationalist and I have nice eyes. I always try to make eye contact with them, smile sincerely, and I listen when they talk. 

Sure enough, her eyes were pretty and she did have a way with eye makeup. And we all agreed, she was a good conversationalist. Still, we scratched our collective heads ...

Then she said, "I just believe I'm special." And she was. “I’m also confident, because I know who I am."  That was true, too.  She did have an inner glow and a gentle air of confidence about her.

When I thought about it, every woman has some beautiful qualities. Most men notice a woman who carries herself well, takes care to dress nicely, and who has an inner glow. All of it together would create a sense of inner pride.

It’s up to us to discover our own unique beauty, acknowledge it, fine tune it, and as a result, we will like ourselves better –-this brings a sense of confidence. Like the woman in the office, if we take care of ourselves and believe we’re special, so will others.

This all creates something most men and women find hard to define in each other, but they do feel it.  It’s called charm and the number one most charming quality in both men and women is a polite and understated confidence.

Poet/Writer/Author of 5 books.
Quora Top Writer 2018.
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