24 Comments
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Marilyn Graham Werden's avatar

I adore your sense of humor—always so on point.

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Hello Marilyn. This was a fun write and I’m glad you found the humor in it! Thank you!

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Elizabeth Grace Martinez's avatar

I love the 7 year renewable contract! I also think weddings should come after ten years, not at the start.

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Hmmm, I’ll have to think about that one, Elizabeth. Thank you for your input!

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Elizabeth Grace Martinez's avatar

can do both!

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Francesca Bossert's avatar

Hmmmm 7 years for the escape clause? I’d put it a tad later as it seems the itch is at its most mosquito bite distracting at 7! But yes… slurping needs to go on the list please…. 😂 loved this, made me smile.

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Yes, I should include manners! Thank you Francesca.

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C.J. Heck's avatar

I included them! Thank you, Francesca.

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Simone Senisin's avatar

😂😂 C.J, some of us just can’t decipher an instruction manual, or follow instructions for that matter. Hands on learning for me 😉😂😂😂😂😂😂

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Hahaha cute, Simone … hands on would be a lot of fun, but that’s part of the reason I had two divorces. Hahaha

I’ll help you decipher an owner’s manual. THEN you can do all the hands on learning and exploration you want, okay? hee hee hee

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Simone Senisin's avatar

It's a deal 🤣. My head is tingling, so John is laughing ... Good luck with that he's saying!

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C.J. Heck's avatar

😁😁🤣🤣😁🤣🤣

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Simone Senisin's avatar

😇

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Marbellys's avatar

I'd add - emotional competence: fight, flight, fawn, freeze?

otherwise I might adopt your template...although my burns from the last relationship are still too fresh for me to contemplate wanting to jump right in anytime soon

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Thank you for your thoughts and suggestion, Marbellys! I’m sorry you were burned from your last relationship —been there, done that.

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Marbellys's avatar

Thank you 🙏🏽

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C.J. Heck's avatar

You’re so very welcome.

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Gary Gruber's avatar

Please be sure to include operating instructions for all those buttons to push AND in that troubleshooting section, the quick and easy fixes when something isn't working. And, yes, perhaps a spare (tire) for when there's blowout or a flat? Finally, how about a loaner when we take the current one in to be serviced?

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Gary, thank you so much for your humorous take on it! I enjoyed!

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Gary Gruber's avatar

Honestly, I think a users manual and a contract are brilliant ideas!

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C.J. Heck's avatar

Wow, thank you, Gary. I know I wish I had the expiring contract during my two fated marriages.

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Oct 24
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C.J. Heck's avatar

You did a two for two like me? You would also have benefitted from the 7-year contract. better than that though, would have been a “New Partner Manual” before we took the plunge. We would have seen the real guys and not what they wanted us to see.

🥰 and😘 Kristin

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Oct 24
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C.J. Heck's avatar

Ah yes, the naive optimism … I was drowning in it at the time I met the two I eventually divorced. They didn’t really know me, nor I them.

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Oct 24
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C.J. Heck's avatar

Thank you, Kristin

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