I was in Washington, DC when the Wall went up. I was shocked by how hard it hit me! I started crying and had to sit down. I did volunteer work during Gulf 1 and 2. Our armies are so young! Our troops need to know we care and we’ve got to step up. Folks, please volunteer when and how you can. The USO is a great place. Consider donating or serving.
My husband was KIA in Vietnam in 1969 and I still can't go to the Wall in DC. I went to the traveling Wall when it was in the town next to ours and it was devastating. It brought me to my knees. Thank God for the vets that were there. Maybe someday I'll make it to DC. Thank you for your comment, Karin. It means a lot.
As you may recall, C.J., I was in the WAC at the same time your dear, young, beloved husband was in Vietnam. It was during the hippie era and I met a lot of "conscripts"--men, formerly hippies, who'd been drafted and were involuntarily serving time during a war they did not support nor believe in. They used to say, FTA does not stand for Fun, Travel, Adventure like the recruiters said. They said it stood for, Fuck The Army. One even told me he considered me and all WACs to be "aiders and abettors" in the deaths of thousands of American men because every desk we sat at freed up one soldier to "go to Vietnam to get his head blown off." I think I walked around shell-shocked from that remark for a week afterwards. Whenever we would ask an officer why were in Vietnam, we always got the same stock answer--the old 'Domino Effect.' If we let the "Commies" take over Vietnam then Cambodia, Thailand, etc. would be next and before you know it, they'd be in our own backyard and by then it will be too late to stop them. Then they would quote two things to us: A poem that went something like, First they came for the Jews, and I turned away because I'm not Jewish, then they came for the _____and I turned away because I'm not _____ and then they came for me... When some of the conscripts would accuse the US Government of violating the international rules of warfare according to the Geneva Convention, they would all say in unison: My Country, Right or Wrong, My Country. So, this was the party line that we were given in answer to your question: Does anyone even know why we were there? Now, your other question, Who won? Well, this is my personal observation. If you look at pictures of Vietnam before we invaded, you'll see jungles and rice paddies, and thousands of peasants living in thatched-roof huts and working those paddies. This is what the country looked like except for the cities of Hanoi and Saigon. Those cities were bustling but the "bustlers" were magistrates and potentates with their entourage of shiny black cars and their servants. If you look at footage of Vietnam now--you'll see the progeny of past peasants scooting around town on Mopeds, hustling for a buck, wearing their earpods and listening to Vietnamese hip hop or sending texts on their iphones. It seems everyone's got a side hustle or a small business of their own. The communists seem to have gone the way of the DoDo Bird and you could almost rename the place Little America. So--who won? You be the judge. Thank you, so much, C.J. for this opportunity to get a few things off that have been festering in my chest for far too long. xoxoxo, ~cc
Gosh, Carol, I had forgotten that you were a WAC. You had some really awful, hurtful things said to you and I'm so sorry. I think I met some of those people in San Francisco when I started flying with TWA. For awhile, I wore my wedding ring and when I was asked what my husband thought of me flying, or when they asked what he did for work and I had to explain, I got some pretty awful comments, too. I soon learned not to talk about him, or the war, or about how devastated I was over my loss.
"He shouldn't have been in Vietnam -- none of them should be there!"
"What a stupid way to die."
"I hope you didn't have children."
"Vietnam isn't even a war."
"Oh, was he a baby killer, too?"
"Why didn't he refuse to go?"
I finally took my ring off and locked it away. Those things hurt me, but from what I was told, It was so much worse for our returning veterans. It was not a time when people wanted to listen --they hated the war and wanted only to take action. These were young boys sent to a foreign land, who offered their lives to fight a war they didn’t cause, performed their duties without question, and returned to their homeland as men, their innocence left behind in the dirt and jungles of a foreign land. On their return, most Vietnam vets stopped most contact with other people, preferring the trusted company of those they knew and understood — their brothers and sisters who served with them. War is hell.
Did you ever see the movie Jack Knife with Robert De Niro? I don't know if I should recommend it--it might be too painful for you to watch. It's basically about returning Vietnam Vets trying to cope with "normal" life in the aftermath of Vietnam. Parts of it were actually filmed in my hometown of Meriden, CT. Its only claim to fame--haha.
Yeah, I think I'll take a pass on the movie. It's interesting that some was filmed in your hometown! Cool! My oldest daughter and her family used to live in Lordship CT. Pretty little town right on the water.
I'd never heard of Lordship so I googled it and found it's a "town within the town" of Stratford, which I have heard of but was never there. CT seems to have a number of towns within towns. My only remaining aunt lives in Kensington which is a "town" within Berlin, CT. Lordship sounds really lovely. I saw some photos of it right on Long Island sound. Thanks for mentioning it, C.J.! It always pays to put a little-something extra in your comments because those always seem to be the hidden gems!
So true! I always learn a lot from you ---of course, you already know I love your writing. You make it seem so effortless, no matter the subject. Your words flow from thought to thought. I'm still waiting for you to set up shop here! You have led an interesting life and you should have a lot to write about and that's on top of your other works. I don't know that I ever went through Berlin CT or Kensington. I'm sure it's beautiful. I love CT. My daughter and family moved from Lordship a couple of years ago to Pleasantville, NY so her hubby's commute wasn't as long. He works for a bank in NYC.
I think it was Joan Didion--I read one of her books back in the 70s and my eyes skipped over her words like a flat stone thrown onto the surface of a lake skips so gracefully along. I remember thinking, if I ever become a writer that's the kind I want to be. I want to make reading so effortless (I've since heard it called flow) that no one will want to put it down until they're finished. I think I must have partially succeeded because quite a few readers on Quora have made comments similar to yours. What a thrill! As for setting up shop on Substack, how would anyone even know I'm there--I already said that if I have to "sell" subscriptions to read my stuff, I just can't do that. At least on Quora I have my "reglars" who are very loyal and supportive and we've established a nice back 'n forth conversation like you and I have. I feel so engaged with them and they let me know they appreciate my "work"--I don't expect to ever make money doing this or at least not enough to make a financial difference in my life so I don't feel highly motivated to do what you're doing, although I've been enjoying what YOU do very much!
Viet Nam. I was in high school. Stepdad was career military and deployed often. I dated long-haired hippie bums. The horror of Viet Nam didn’t hit me until 1970 and my classmates were off to war. Some didn’t come back. None of it made sense. And still doesn’t. One guy I remember vividly, didn’t come back. I can’t imagine how his family coped. We need to take better care of our military & veterans. We need to vote better. We need to hold our govt accountable. We need to hold our politicians responsible. 2024 and we’re still bringing back bodies.
Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Karin. Everything you said, I agree with. It is time we stop fighting other countries' wars. If we could somehow lock the leaders of the countries that have a problem with each other in a room together with two large boxes of water balloons and let them go at it ... I know, I'm making light of a huge problem and I apologize. But things have got to change. Thank you again for your comment.
Actually, C.J., that's a great idea. Say there are two countries that we can plainly see are about to go to loggerheads (as my Southern-boy hubby would say). We simply find a way to kidnap the two top leaders and stick them into a room for arbitration just like the unions do. No one comes out until they reach a binding agreement.
I was in Washington, DC when the Wall went up. I was shocked by how hard it hit me! I started crying and had to sit down. I did volunteer work during Gulf 1 and 2. Our armies are so young! Our troops need to know we care and we’ve got to step up. Folks, please volunteer when and how you can. The USO is a great place. Consider donating or serving.
My husband was KIA in Vietnam in 1969 and I still can't go to the Wall in DC. I went to the traveling Wall when it was in the town next to ours and it was devastating. It brought me to my knees. Thank God for the vets that were there. Maybe someday I'll make it to DC. Thank you for your comment, Karin. It means a lot.
As you may recall, C.J., I was in the WAC at the same time your dear, young, beloved husband was in Vietnam. It was during the hippie era and I met a lot of "conscripts"--men, formerly hippies, who'd been drafted and were involuntarily serving time during a war they did not support nor believe in. They used to say, FTA does not stand for Fun, Travel, Adventure like the recruiters said. They said it stood for, Fuck The Army. One even told me he considered me and all WACs to be "aiders and abettors" in the deaths of thousands of American men because every desk we sat at freed up one soldier to "go to Vietnam to get his head blown off." I think I walked around shell-shocked from that remark for a week afterwards. Whenever we would ask an officer why were in Vietnam, we always got the same stock answer--the old 'Domino Effect.' If we let the "Commies" take over Vietnam then Cambodia, Thailand, etc. would be next and before you know it, they'd be in our own backyard and by then it will be too late to stop them. Then they would quote two things to us: A poem that went something like, First they came for the Jews, and I turned away because I'm not Jewish, then they came for the _____and I turned away because I'm not _____ and then they came for me... When some of the conscripts would accuse the US Government of violating the international rules of warfare according to the Geneva Convention, they would all say in unison: My Country, Right or Wrong, My Country. So, this was the party line that we were given in answer to your question: Does anyone even know why we were there? Now, your other question, Who won? Well, this is my personal observation. If you look at pictures of Vietnam before we invaded, you'll see jungles and rice paddies, and thousands of peasants living in thatched-roof huts and working those paddies. This is what the country looked like except for the cities of Hanoi and Saigon. Those cities were bustling but the "bustlers" were magistrates and potentates with their entourage of shiny black cars and their servants. If you look at footage of Vietnam now--you'll see the progeny of past peasants scooting around town on Mopeds, hustling for a buck, wearing their earpods and listening to Vietnamese hip hop or sending texts on their iphones. It seems everyone's got a side hustle or a small business of their own. The communists seem to have gone the way of the DoDo Bird and you could almost rename the place Little America. So--who won? You be the judge. Thank you, so much, C.J. for this opportunity to get a few things off that have been festering in my chest for far too long. xoxoxo, ~cc
Gosh, Carol, I had forgotten that you were a WAC. You had some really awful, hurtful things said to you and I'm so sorry. I think I met some of those people in San Francisco when I started flying with TWA. For awhile, I wore my wedding ring and when I was asked what my husband thought of me flying, or when they asked what he did for work and I had to explain, I got some pretty awful comments, too. I soon learned not to talk about him, or the war, or about how devastated I was over my loss.
"He shouldn't have been in Vietnam -- none of them should be there!"
"What a stupid way to die."
"I hope you didn't have children."
"Vietnam isn't even a war."
"Oh, was he a baby killer, too?"
"Why didn't he refuse to go?"
I finally took my ring off and locked it away. Those things hurt me, but from what I was told, It was so much worse for our returning veterans. It was not a time when people wanted to listen --they hated the war and wanted only to take action. These were young boys sent to a foreign land, who offered their lives to fight a war they didn’t cause, performed their duties without question, and returned to their homeland as men, their innocence left behind in the dirt and jungles of a foreign land. On their return, most Vietnam vets stopped most contact with other people, preferring the trusted company of those they knew and understood — their brothers and sisters who served with them. War is hell.
Did you ever see the movie Jack Knife with Robert De Niro? I don't know if I should recommend it--it might be too painful for you to watch. It's basically about returning Vietnam Vets trying to cope with "normal" life in the aftermath of Vietnam. Parts of it were actually filmed in my hometown of Meriden, CT. Its only claim to fame--haha.
Yeah, I think I'll take a pass on the movie. It's interesting that some was filmed in your hometown! Cool! My oldest daughter and her family used to live in Lordship CT. Pretty little town right on the water.
I'd never heard of Lordship so I googled it and found it's a "town within the town" of Stratford, which I have heard of but was never there. CT seems to have a number of towns within towns. My only remaining aunt lives in Kensington which is a "town" within Berlin, CT. Lordship sounds really lovely. I saw some photos of it right on Long Island sound. Thanks for mentioning it, C.J.! It always pays to put a little-something extra in your comments because those always seem to be the hidden gems!
So true! I always learn a lot from you ---of course, you already know I love your writing. You make it seem so effortless, no matter the subject. Your words flow from thought to thought. I'm still waiting for you to set up shop here! You have led an interesting life and you should have a lot to write about and that's on top of your other works. I don't know that I ever went through Berlin CT or Kensington. I'm sure it's beautiful. I love CT. My daughter and family moved from Lordship a couple of years ago to Pleasantville, NY so her hubby's commute wasn't as long. He works for a bank in NYC.
I think it was Joan Didion--I read one of her books back in the 70s and my eyes skipped over her words like a flat stone thrown onto the surface of a lake skips so gracefully along. I remember thinking, if I ever become a writer that's the kind I want to be. I want to make reading so effortless (I've since heard it called flow) that no one will want to put it down until they're finished. I think I must have partially succeeded because quite a few readers on Quora have made comments similar to yours. What a thrill! As for setting up shop on Substack, how would anyone even know I'm there--I already said that if I have to "sell" subscriptions to read my stuff, I just can't do that. At least on Quora I have my "reglars" who are very loyal and supportive and we've established a nice back 'n forth conversation like you and I have. I feel so engaged with them and they let me know they appreciate my "work"--I don't expect to ever make money doing this or at least not enough to make a financial difference in my life so I don't feel highly motivated to do what you're doing, although I've been enjoying what YOU do very much!
Viet Nam. I was in high school. Stepdad was career military and deployed often. I dated long-haired hippie bums. The horror of Viet Nam didn’t hit me until 1970 and my classmates were off to war. Some didn’t come back. None of it made sense. And still doesn’t. One guy I remember vividly, didn’t come back. I can’t imagine how his family coped. We need to take better care of our military & veterans. We need to vote better. We need to hold our govt accountable. We need to hold our politicians responsible. 2024 and we’re still bringing back bodies.
Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Karin. Everything you said, I agree with. It is time we stop fighting other countries' wars. If we could somehow lock the leaders of the countries that have a problem with each other in a room together with two large boxes of water balloons and let them go at it ... I know, I'm making light of a huge problem and I apologize. But things have got to change. Thank you again for your comment.
Actually, C.J., that's a great idea. Say there are two countries that we can plainly see are about to go to loggerheads (as my Southern-boy hubby would say). We simply find a way to kidnap the two top leaders and stick them into a room for arbitration just like the unions do. No one comes out until they reach a binding agreement.
That makes a lot of sense ... no water balloon though, huh?
Sure, throw everything in there and see what sticks! ;-)))
hahahahahaha